Turning a new leaf for the New Year!

Ok, so it's been two months since my last post. Hmmmm, so much was going on with the Holidays and all. Things are starting to wind down so I should be able to have more time to spare for some writing. The Holidays were great, spent it with family ofcourse. Great food, music and stories. Santa was good to all of us this year....hehe. I gotmy first Coach bag...I love it!

Its time to get back into shape and ready for the summer. My boyfriend is planning a vacation for us so I want to look my best. Things have been great with us, perfect if you can use the word loosely. I am very happy. 2005 was bitter sweet for me. I met the love of my life and lost my best friend all in the same month almost. But for what it's worth, I have no regrets. People come and go in your life and we just have to accept that. I have. The hard thing for me has been to trust again. With friends that is. I have found it difficult to trust anyone, afraid of being shot down or critisized for the decision that I make in my life. So I have been keeping to myself and hanging with those that bear no judgement on me. At times I feel a bit sad because I no longer have that one girlfreind who you share your secrets with. The one person who you can call at anytime just to let them know you saw a dress or shoes you liked. I miss it. I have made the effort to keep my line of communication opened with those people who I can still call my friends and so far it's working out. Don't get me wrong, I am not in dire need of a friend. I have very dear friends that I hold close to me and my boyfriend is ofcourse my bestfriend, but sometimes a girl needs another girl in her life who can relate to her and thats what I miss. I think that I was subconsciencely staying away from others because I was afraid of opening up and then losing them. So at least now, I have come to realize that those people who are in my life now, always have been and never gave me their backs. Those are my true friends. Those are the ones who I don't need to call every minute just to check in, or who won't get upset because I hung out with "Mary" two days straight instead of them. True friends give you space to grow and learn from your mistakes, not hover over you like a pet and force you to do things just because they do it.
The day before yesterday I went to the movies with one of those friends and even though we didn't really have much time to catch up, I enjoyed myself. I felt at ease and comfortable. I didn't have to explain my every move. We ate, saw a movie, "Memoirs of a Geisha" and then took the train home together. It was the most fun I have had in a long time. I needed that. I needed to be with someone my own gender and share silly stories with. Be girly and talk about makeup. I loved it. So even though we don't hang out as often as we should, I know I can count on her and if she doesn't already know it, she can always count on me. Thats what friends are for.

On another note, I read "A Million Little Pieces" by James Frey and must say it was an excellent read. I couldn't put the book down. It was the most real I have ever seen anyone write. Completely raw with a touch of humor. For someone to depict their life and allow us to feel what they felt is amazing. I give James Frey props and much respect for allowing me to take a peek into what his life was like. My next read....hmmm...probably ....not sure. I guess until I find another good read I will just come back here and pick up where I left off.

Sayonara!